cor ad cor loquitur

where heart speaks to heart

The one that matters — October 8, 2015

The one that matters

Here’s some free-writing based on real moments. Hope you enjoy. Also, hi, it’s been a while. I’ve been so busy with school. 2 more years of pharmacy school to go!

I wish you would smile more and appreciate the fact you were blessed with a wonderful life by the One and Only. When I see you smile at events like graduation, I feel happy because that’s a genuine smile. But I know you are severely depressed. But life is a gift from God. I wish you’d prefer staying alive than dying. What hurts the most is when you talk about wanting to die. Life is temporary, that I know, but life is also a gift.

I wish you would appreciate everything about life. The fact that you do have a wonderful family with a wonderful husband and wonderful kids. That’s all that should matter. You should love the fact that you live away from the horrors that plague your home country. Yes, I know your family lives there. But do they actually care about you? Tell me one time they actually cared about you. When you’re with your other family, you have no say in important decisions. That’s probably why you feel the way you do.

I know life is hard for you. That’s why I always pray that you are happy. If living here does not make you happy, then you can go away. I know you prefer the other country. If you think they truly care for you and you will genuinely be happy, then you can go. I have accepted that fact that living away from you is fine if that is the key to your happiness. Sorry, we don’t like the other country, but if you like it, be happy and feel free to move there. I just want you to be happy because you have truly had the hardest life.

I am sorry for everything. You’ve had the hardest life. I don’t want you to wish that life ended for you. I want you to appreciate everything about your life, but focus more on the good. I want to see you happy during every occasion. I want those tears to be tears of happiness and not tears of sorrow. I am so sorry for everything you’ve been through in life, even the things I haven’t done. Someone needs to tell you how important you are, and to me, you are the most important person I know. You are my bestest friend. I love you so much, and I want everything in life to go perfectly for you..

Yours truly.

I know this is sad, but this was a way for me to vent my feelings. A lot of personal things have been happening in life, and while I won’t share too much, this vague post hopefully explains some things. It certainly did feel like a burden has been lifted from my shoulders. Till next time, stay happy always.